Review: Hailey's Capture by Bryan Weston

Any time a man sits down and attempts to write lesbian sex, BDSM style or not, I have to give him credit for at least stepping outside the comfort zone.  Over the years I've come to the conclusion that I just don't really understand women - at least not from a perspective where I want to be writing something describing the emotional output of the fair sex.  So when I sat down and read through Bryan Weston's "Hailey's Capture" available from the BDSM Library, I was already just a bit biased in favor of the story.

As expected for a male written BDSM lesbian story, the focus was centered more on the action than the emotion.  After reading female written lesbian stories the best analogy I can give is that these stories are like oral sex.  A man can perform cunnilingus on a woman and she'll enjoy the experience because it is intense and rough and direct.  Or a woman can perform cunnilingus on a woman and she'll enjoy the experience because it is intense, delicate, and all encompassing.  Point being both experiences are enjoyable, but very different, and for entirely opposite reasons.

In a nut shell Hailey's Capture is about a BDSM dominatrix who enjoys luring teenage girls to her home, then sexually tormenting them.  Weston's story doesn't really have a plot beyond what the dominatrix does to her fresh victim, but it doesn't need to.  I myself write plenty of stories that I condemn with the phrase "porn without plot."  That's not the point of these kinds of tales.  Besides, the reality is that Weston has an inventive mind and while the circumstances of his story are common and found elsewhere, the devil is in the details and his are exquisite.

The best scene in the entire story is where Hailey is bound upright into the Dominatrix's fucking machine, then stuffed with an anal electrode, along with electric clamps on her nipples and a suction cup on her clit.  And as poor little Hailey endures the non-stop pounding of the six inch long synthetic cock, the dominatrix leaves.  Perfect.

The end of the story is a setup for a part two or a sequel.  It doesn't matter which actually because part one is a self-contained tale all by itself.  This is the mark of an author who understands the concept of episodic writing, an understanding that is quite rare on the BDSM Library.  Even better, the story is relatively well written, in first person, and I didn't see any major errors to distract the readers.  That's always nice.

I'm hoping Mr. Weston writes a part two or a sequel to this fun, little tale.  Why?  Because I want to see how long Hailey spends on that machine!  I give this tale 9 out of 10.

Read "Hailey's Capture" by Bryan Weston.

Review: "My Birthday Gift" by Charles E. Campbell

Story Codes: MF/f exhibition modification Swallowing Tit Torture D/s BDSM real consensual reluctant Serious

Synopsis: A first person recounting of how a person's life was forever altered by a fortieth birthday gift

Recently I read Charles E. Campbell’s “My Birthday Gift” onthe BDSM Library.

It’s not often that I find a story that appeals directly to me.  Erotica authors in general write for themselves first, and their audience second.   This backward thinking makes some of the most strangest of stories, ones that appeal in limited directions.

“My Birthday Gift” is a story that, despite my not liking everything that happened in it, appealed to my senses.  Admittedly, it was a turn on, which is definitely the goal of every erotica author.  But beyond that, Mr. Campbell did a darned good job in expressing the feelings of the main character.  The emotionalism caught me up, wrapped around me, and intensified the eroticism of the tale.

From a grammatical perspective, “My Birthday Gift” is well written.  There were few if any errors that I saw that distracted from the overall narrative and the sentences were constructed well.  There was a decent mix of simple and complex sentences that added depth and complexity to the tale and punctuation was handled well.  It’s so nice to see someone ELSE who understands comma use.

But while “My Birthday Gift” was better than most of the drivel left at the doorstep of the BDSM Library, it wasn’t perfect.  First of all, the plot, while well executed and written, was just a tad bit unbelievable.  The wife, who gave herself completely to her husband, was instantly made a sex slave.  Her behavior, which I DID find believable, was predictable, since a good slave girl follows the orders of her master.  But I felt that Mr. Campbell really lost out on a good opportunity to create tension and varying levels of degradation for his protagonist.  I believe that he made the antagonist, the husband, too harsh and too extreme right from the start.  By taking it in gentle steps, the story could have been better timed to give the reader a steadily increasing sensation of tension, and allowing even more emotional turmoil to affect the wife.  With Mr. Campbell’s capability at writing, it would have been child’s play to make this short story into a major novella.

I also want to point out that Mr. Campbell wrote the piece, not only in first person, but from the female’s perspective.  I have to admire that. I’ve only done it once and I had help from Breanne Erickson, with the details. I don’t think like a woman and Mr. Campbell either had good advice, or is more savvy with womenfolk than I am.  He did it well.  I’ve articulated how difficult it is for even talented, experienced authors to use first person narrative, since it by necessity limits the descriptive process.  But Mr. Campbell pulls it off, and does it well.

In summary, “My Birthday Gift” was a beautiful little tale that only suffered from a timing problem.  The writing itself was of high quality, the sex and humiliation scenes well scripted, and all in all, a most pleasant diversion.  A definite 9 out of 10 stars!

Read “My Birthday Gift” by Charles E. Campbell at the BDSMLibrary!