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Synopsis: A first person recounting of
how a person's life was forever altered by a fortieth birthday gift
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Recently I read Charles E. Campbell’s “My Birthday Gift” onthe BDSM Library.
It’s not often that I find a story that appeals directly to
me. Erotica authors in general write for
themselves first, and their audience second.
This backward thinking makes some of the most strangest of stories, ones
that appeal in limited directions.
“My Birthday Gift” is a story that, despite my not liking
everything that happened in it, appealed to my senses. Admittedly, it was a turn on, which is
definitely the goal of every erotica author.
But beyond that, Mr. Campbell did a darned good job in expressing the
feelings of the main character. The
emotionalism caught me up, wrapped around me, and intensified the eroticism of
the tale.
From a grammatical perspective, “My Birthday Gift” is well
written. There were few if any errors
that I saw that distracted from the overall narrative and the sentences were
constructed well. There was a decent mix
of simple and complex sentences that added depth and complexity to the tale and
punctuation was handled well. It’s so
nice to see someone ELSE who understands comma use.
But while “My Birthday Gift” was better than most of the
drivel left at the doorstep of the BDSM Library, it wasn’t perfect. First of all, the plot, while well executed
and written, was just a tad bit unbelievable.
The wife, who gave herself completely to her husband, was instantly made
a sex slave. Her behavior, which I DID
find believable, was predictable, since a good slave girl follows the orders of
her master. But I felt that Mr. Campbell
really lost out on a good opportunity to create tension and varying levels of degradation
for his protagonist. I believe that he
made the antagonist, the husband, too harsh and too extreme right from the
start. By taking it in gentle steps, the
story could have been better timed to give the reader a steadily increasing
sensation of tension, and allowing even more emotional turmoil to affect the
wife. With Mr. Campbell’s capability at
writing, it would have been child’s play to make this short story into a major
novella.
I also want to point out that Mr. Campbell wrote the piece,
not only in first person, but from the female’s perspective. I have to admire that. I’ve only done it once
and I had help from Breanne Erickson, with the details. I don’t think like a
woman and Mr. Campbell either had good advice, or is more savvy with womenfolk
than I am. He did it well. I’ve articulated how difficult it is for even
talented, experienced authors to use first person narrative, since it by
necessity limits the descriptive process.
But Mr. Campbell pulls it off, and does it well.
In summary, “My Birthday Gift” was a beautiful little tale
that only suffered from a timing problem.
The writing itself was of high quality, the sex and humiliation scenes
well scripted, and all in all, a most pleasant diversion. A definite 9 out of 10 stars!
If you haven't read it, part three came up November of last year. :)
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